News

Guysguise.com Closed - April 20, 2003

Guysguise.com has closed its doors. We hope everyone enjoyed the 'zine, and look forward to future projects. Special thanks to ARGN for hosting the site.

Change Issue Frequency - April 1, 2003

As of April 1, 2003, Guysguise.com will be updated every two weeks, rather than weekly. This is a decision based upon recent personal developments. We want to thank our devoted readers for their continued support through this change.

Change in Personnel - January 2, 2003

With great sadness, Guysguise has to announce the resignation of Manuel Vanos. Manuel was forced to resign his position of copy editor because he went stark raving mad. No one was sending letters in, praising Guysguise for all it does for the ARG community, and he got a little upset. We'll miss you Manuel!

This results in two things: A new copy editor and a new employee! We are glad to promote Francine Robideux as our new copy editor, and are just as glad to welcome Waldo Emerson Cook to the staff as a contributing writer!

We hope that Waldo doesn't kill anyone, and that Francine doesn't go crazy.

Public Announcement - December 14, 2002

As the holiday season approaches, Guysguise.com would like to wish you and yours a very happy holidays. We will not be publishing any pastry on Christmas Day, in compliance with the Holiday Act of Zanzibar, Article 4, Section 17, Act 5.

Leaked internal memo - December 6, 2002

Hey Ingrahausen, you sorry sack of monkey crap. Get your ass in gear and get those RSS feeds to ARGN.com as soon as yesterday, or I'll kick your ass so hard you'll taste the toe of my boot in the back of your throat.

Candice Joplin

Statement of hiring - November 29, 2002

Guysguise.com is happy to announce the hiring of five new employees. All five are from a journalistic background and have had experiences across the globe. they are:

George Burrows, feature editor
Nancy Maclean, contributing writer
A Ferret on Amitriptyline, reviewer
Manuel Vanos, copy editor
Mary Cook, administrative assistant

We hope that all of our new employees have an enjoyable and profitable experience at Guysguise.com.

Press release - Dr. Wendy Marino (November 27, 2002)

Guysguise.com, the future in web entertainment, is proud to announce that Dr. Wendy Marino, sex therapist, has signed an exclusive contract with the internet and print versions of Guysguise.com. Dr. Marino has been a freelance contributor for the magazine in the past, but has decided to dispense her special brand of advice exclusively at Guysguise.com

Dr. Wendy Marino will be kicking off the east coast leg of her "Good Sex Gone Bad" lecture series tour on December 13, 2002, at the Palisades conference room in Hoboken, New Jersey. Guysguise.com is a proud sponsor of this tour. Look for special "Good Sex Gone Bad" merchandise in future editions of Guysguise.com.

Financial report - November 26, 2002

To all of our investors and sponsors:

Guysguise.com will be forced to file a chapter 11 bankruptcy claim unless it can arrange some sort of deal with some sort of big name athlete, celebrity, or sex therapist by the end of the working week. We will keep you posted as to how this situation affects you and your credit card numbers we have on file.